A Man Needs A Woman, Just As A Woman Needs A Man
(What kind of relationship are you in?)
By Clarence Andrews
The Lord God said, it is not good that the man should
be alone; I will make a help meet for him.
(Genesis 2:18)
God did not think it was good for man to be alone, so he gave him a helpmeet, in other words a companion. God wanted man to have a close relationship with him, as well as the woman he gave to man. God put man as the head, and the woman would be a compliment to the man. Today, men and women are seeking the other out; hoping to find that suitable mate. Dating normally starts while we are just teens, but even at such a young age teens go through the same heart breaks that adults go through. When we talk about a relationship, we need to refer to Godly relationships. Many of the relationships we get involved in are not Godly in any way, but ungodly, and I would have to say that I’ve been in quite a few of those myself. It is not always our intention to become involved in what we know is an ungodly relationship, but many times because we are already burning in our flesh, we walk right into that relationship with eyes wide open. We knowingly connect ourselves to people that we know are outside the will of God, basically, so we can fulfill the desires of our flesh. But it’s not always the unsaved people we will connect to, we’ll connect to other men and women who profess to be Christians. God did not want Adam to be alone; so he gave him a companion, but his companion would be apart him. From one of Adams ribs God created woman, and Adam named her woman; for Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. (Genesis 2: 21-23) Men and women have this physical and spiritual need to be connected to one another. The scripture says that God told the man and woman to be fruitful and multiply, and it reads as this, “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.” (Genesis 1:28) All of this is just to say that God wanted men and women to be together, and not men with men, or a woman with another woman.
A relationship consists of a man and a woman, and God will never see it any other way. So what do we need to be looking for in a relationship? Love, trust, and commitment are just a few thing we should be looking for, but this is also a learning period for both. This is the time that both parties should be checking to see if the other has good marriage qualities, and not if he or she has good sexual qualities. Being in a relationship does not mean you have to become sexually intimate with everyone you date; God would prefer that you not do this and that it be saved for the marriage bed, in fact, he insist on it. Both parties should be getting to know one another during this time of courtship. God made each of us different from the other; so we have different personalities, strength’s, weakness, and emotions.
Most people talk a good game, but rarely play fair. In the past I have participated on a well-known Internet dating site. I attempted to see if any woman was truly looking for what they said they wanted in a man. Some said they were looking for a man who would be upfront with no game, or they were not concern with the salary a man made, or they wanted to be friends first before getting sexually intimate with a man. Many of these women posted pictures of themselves when they were younger, but no recent pictures, and some posted past and present pictures. But the bottom line is; most of them were either interested in how much you made, and how much you could do for them. I also did an experiment where I posted a fake profile vs. my real profile. In the salary range I stated that I made above $50,000.00, and close to $100,000.00. My fake profile got more responses than my real one did; some of the women who I contacted on my true profile but never responded, also tried to contact me at the fake one. What these women saw were dollar signs $$$$$ in their eyes. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel secure in a relationship, and especially in a marriage. But God wants us to understand that true security will never be found in men or women finances, but through him only.
You need to know why you want a relationship with the person you are pursuing, and are there any under lying motives behind your quest. Any relationship or marriage should be based on love, and love should be the foundation in which the relationship or marriage is built upon. Some relationships are based on looks and appearance, sex, convenience, and financial gain, but none of these will keep a relationship or marriage together. If you are entering a relationship based on any of these latter reasons you should reconsider your actions, and find out how you really feel about him or her, before potentially damaging someone’s heart. If you find yourself more focused on what you want and desire, rather than on him or her, your heart is somewhere else, and not with that person. When you enter a relationship based on hidden motives you are in fact lying to that other person about why you are with them; and if honesty cannot be found at the beginning of a relationship, it certainly won’t be found at the beginning of the marriage.
A man needs a woman, and a woman needs a man, but sometimes you’ll find men and women saying that they don’t need the other; and this may prove true if the two has it firmly made up in their minds to do without the other, but I think this is only true to a certain extent. One thing I can definitely say about being in a relationship is that, no man or woman wants to be used.