(Resisting The Urges)
And God created Man in his image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. Genesis 1:27.
Is it wrong for a Christian man or woman to spend time alone?
I don’t think it’s wrong for two people to be alone, but if the two have had past problems dealing with the flesh, they may want to reconsider spending any time alone without any safe guards. The safe guards I’m referring to are having someone else present in the house, watching television in the living room, and not the bedroom. Keep at least one window curtain open, so as, to not allow much privacy. Two well-grounded Christians can be alone together, but they will experience the same temptations as anyone. If you are going to be alone with anyone of the opposite sex you need to do more than just be there to kiss and hold one another. Spend time in prayer together, have a bible study, or have a praise and worship hour together. But the best thing two people can do when they know they will be alone is, kneel down together and pray when they first get together. Keeping a spiritual atmosphere helps to keep things under control, and this is for the older Christians who are dating as well. It’s important for both people to keep his and her-self under control at all times. I have been in situations where I was alone with a female, and in just a short time we were going the route of the heathen, (Letting our flesh get the best of us). There will be many times you will have total victory over the flesh, and then, there will be those times you will fail. Don’t become discouraged if you give in to the flesh, but use the conviction you are feeling to bring you into prayer and repentance. God will forgive those who come to him with a sincere heart.
Is there anything wrong with kissing?
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth; For thy love is better than wine. Song of Solomon 1:2
What is that old phrase? A kiss is but a kiss, there’s nothing wrong with kissing, but kissing can lead to other things that we should not be doing if we are not careful. As with any couple, kissing is one way we express our feelings and emotions to one another. But you don’t have to always kiss to express feelings you have for someone. You can show expressions of love by holding their hand, writing a poem especially for them, giving a card, or flowers. Kissing is just one-way to express feelings, as you’ve seen, I’ve shown you others. But kissing seems to be our first choice in showing affection.
Is it ok for a Christian couple to go to movies?
I’ve been going to movies since I was 12 years of age, and after I was saved, I took my dates to see a movie. But over the years movies have changed a lot. Many of the movies that are advertised contain a lot of nudity and profanity. But they still make a few good movies that Christian couples can see. Before going to see a movie you can check the rating of that movie, and see what it contains. Another option when dating is renting videos. You can always read what the movie is about and know the rating of that movie.
What if I get a case of the touchiness while dating?
Everything is permissible for me, but not everything is good for me. Everything is permissible for me, but I will not become a slave to anything. 1 Corinthians 6:12
One of the things you do not want to start doing is touching one another. Years ago we referred to this as, innocent petting; nothing is innocent about it. Once you start touching one another you are going to want to go further. Each time you will get a little bolder with your touching, until finally, you will end up having a sexual relation. You may think that petting is permissible, but it’s not, because petting is actually sexual foreplay. And anything of a sexual nature belongs in the marriage bed. The apostle Paul was saying that even though everything was permissible to him, doing everything was not good for him. And because everything was permissible to him, he would not become a slave to anything. Many Christians feel that it’s ok to engage in some form of sexual touching, as long as they do not perform the sexual act itself. At one time or another we have all fell into that practice of touching one another. And we all seem to have that thought; this is ok, as long as I don’t go all the way. If you are a mature Christian man or woman, you already know that touching between a man and a woman usually ends up, with the two sleeping together. It’s not always easy to avoid intimate contact with the opposite sex, but we as Christians have to put forth our best effort in doing so. Even if it means you have to run from what you are desiring, and from the person you are desiring. Remember what the word of God has to say, Keep on running from sexual immorality! Any other sin that a man commits is one outside his body, but the man who commits the sexual sin is sinning against his own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18. And let’s not forget this one, For it is God's will that you should keep pure in person, that you should practice abstinence from sexual immorality, and each of you must know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4.
Is it ok to share a room with someone of the opposite sex?
Keep away from all appearance of evil. 1 Thessalonians 5:22
This is where it calls for wisdom on behalf of the reader. There may be times when a situation will come up, and you may be forced to share a room with someone of the opposite sex. I know, I’ve been in that situation where I’ve had to stay part of the night with a female. This has been on occasions when it’s a bad storm at night, and my vision at night is not that good. I would try to hold up until the storm let up. All anyone needs is for someone to see your car parked in front of a female’s house half or all the night, and start assuming the wrong thing. And don’t let it be someone who knows other members of your church, because you will hear about your overnight stay from others. You can’t always avoid situations you may find yourself in, but it must be in your mind at all times to try and avoid the very appearance of evil. You may have already been in a situation like this, and you know that nothing was going on, and so did God. But to the person that’s looking in from the outside, the appearance is evil. It is not my intention to persuade anyone to drive when they believe it is a danger to life. But remember, it will not always be the people of the world who will be condemning you of your actions, ninety five percent of the time it will be other Christians you know.